TALLAHASSEE, FL -- Communicating with teens can be hard and may seem even harder now that school is in full swing. Parents may feel like they are only getting one word answers, which is one reason why learning to communicate at the start of the school year can help.
Family therapist Jane Marks explained a few tips on how to start that conversation.
1. BEGIN THIS NEW SCHOOL YEAR WITH A CLEAN SLATE AND A NEW SCRIPT. This is an opportunity to kick start communication in a way that historically does not offer solutions, does not fix problems, but rather begins with; "I am going to take time to listen and ask questions".
2. YOU'VE HEARD THE TERM, "PICK YOUR BATTLES", DON'T PICK BATTLES THAT REQUIRE FIGHTING. Identifying issues that have room for negotiating and compromising can be an important strategy in reducing the level and frequency of conflict.
3. TRY TO MAINTAIN A POSITIVE PERSPECTIVE ON ISSUES AS THEY ARISE. Perspective makes a big difference. The way you perceive a problem is often very different from the way your teenager perceives an issue and vice versa.
4. TRY TO REMAIN AS CALM AS POSSIBLE WHEN HAVING IMPORTANT CONVERSATIONS. Too often we are frustrated and angry and we are ready to get revved up, but to the extent that we are able to remain calm, we will not create any undue anxiety, particularly in a volatile teenager.
