TALLAHASSEE, Fla. (WTXL) - This week's "Teen Talk" is focused on advice for parents when encouraging teens to embrace diversity.
WTXL contributor and family therapist Jane Marks:
Teens are keenly aware of social status and group membership and the ranking of social groups. So this is the time in their lives where they may be experimenting with different thoughts and different groups. A parent can help shape tolerance and awareness of discrimination. Here are some tips.
1. The key to encouraging tolerance and understanding of discrimination and differentness is with education. Lessons regarding differentness can come from a lot of places, for example, older family members or schools can teach kids. For example, recent research shows that schools that incorporate discussions about mental illness or discrimination in their classes gives students permission to talk about it.
2. Embrace differentness. Teens at this time are developing their own personal identities which can be sometimes be threatened by the sense of difference. Teens often feel like difference is negative. Too often we, as parents, become bystanders when it comes to talking about issues of diversity and differentness.
3. Have a conversation about your feelings about race and ethnicity. Remember that teenagers are often dealing with intimate amorous relationships and therefore gender, race and ethnicity may sometimes factor into the experience.
4. Encourage experiences outside of their comfort zone which include people from other ethnic backgrounds. Self-segregation can be common among teens. Service, learning and volunteer activities in the community are examples of where we can learn more about other people and develop relationships.
5. Talk to your teen about stereotypes. Role model tolerance to the extent that you can, but also talk about your own prejudices whatever they may be.
6. If your child should experience prejudice or discrimination in any way it is vital that you don't react angrily but talk about how you would navigate this. Ask for their input in terms of what they would do to counter this discriminating event or feeling marginalized.
7. If your teen participates in an act or does something that indicates a lack of tolerance share with them special techniques that used to help release anger and manage their emotions.
8. Teach your teen not only to cope with discrimination but also to observe it. There are instances where teens have been discriminated against simply because they are teenagers. In my office I am constantly hearing stories about youthful age discrimination where teens will tell of being ignored by sales people or people won't respond to them simply because of their age. This is also a way of teaching an understanding of discrimination and tolerance.
9. When teens are intolerant to others or they practice discrimination, remember there are indeed physical and physiological effects for the teens that are the targets. Research points to depression, less successful experiences in academics and more physical problems. So it is the teaching that we do as parents that help shape our children's view of the world.
So parents, again, we hope this is helpful and we hope you have a great Martin Luther King holiday.
Watch Teen Talk every other Monday at 6:30am on WTXL's Sunrise.
